Me-The-“Kiasu” Mom

In case you do not know what “kiasu” mean.  By definition from Wikipedia, “kiasu” is a Hokkien word that literally means “fear of losing”

I once asked my son’s tution teacher if I’m a “kiasu” mother.  She is honest enough to say, “yes, a little.” but added that now she is a mother herself (her girl is 4 months old), she finally understand how I feel.  She admitted that she is thinking which pre-school she should place her girl 3 years later. 

Well, school exams are round the corner (to be exact, in another 2 weeks).  For those parents with schooling children, you will know exactly what I’m going through now.   I guess parents are more stress than their children during exams period.   Exams are usually a “testing” period for most parents.  It is a time when parents lose their “cool” easily.  My son once questioned me why am I so impatient with him especially when I am teaching him.  There are just too many things to do with too little time so when he kept silence after I asked a question; I started questioning him if he was listening to me just now or when he made the same mistake twice, I would impatiently ask if he had learnt from his previous mistake.  I once overheard a colleague telling his son that she was very disappointed with his exam results because he had not put in his best effort for the exams (how can we be so sure that he had not tried his best? Maybe his definition of “best” is different from ours).

Okay, I am a “kiasu” mom but how am I not to be “kiasu” when the world has become so competitive.  You might have read my previous article on “Children have Stress Too!” posted on 8 October 2009.  I am trying and learning (very hard) to “relax” myself and not to stress my son too much.  As such, besides the much needed 9 hours recharge sleeping time and meal time, he still get to enjoy his TV time and play time despite exam period.  And may I add that he gets really upset if I were to cut his TV time and play time, especially on Sunday, when he can play x-box with Genz Dad.   So as much as I’m tempted to, I try not to take away his treasured 2 hours x-box time with Genz Dad. 

You may ask how “kiasu” am I.   Well, this is how “kiasu” I am.  Besides the usual school routine and school homework, my son has 1½ hours tution classes every Wednesday to Saturday; 45 minutes piano lesson every Monday; and 1 hour swimming lesson every Sunday. 

Not “kiasu” enough?  Maybe but for now, I think it’s enough for my 9 years old Genz Kid.  Sorry my darling Genz Kid, Genz Mom is still learning how to relax here!

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2 Replies to “Me-The-“Kiasu” Mom”

  1. As adults, we can take time off if we feel “down” but what can the poor children do …. they cannot take “time-off” to destress themselves especially if it’s during exam period unless we, the parents, say “yes”.

    So Angie, I don’t think you are too relax. In fact, I think your kids just need their “time-out” and you have gracefully grant them that.

    I have much to learn every day ….

  2. Shouting, lost cool, sounds very familiar. Even during the one in a blue moon session. That’s the main reason I sent both my girls to BASC. When the exam coming, I can see my 9 years old, Kellie, are very tired from the extra work. As for my 7 years old, Kathy, still a baby, don’t care attitude.
    They’re not very interested, once in a while. Kellie prefers to read story books that was chosen and bought by me. Kathy prefers to play toy and drawing. DS and game boy is a weekend thing. Hope I am not too relax.

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